2005-11-29 - 11:19 a.m.
October 2005
Me and b/f attended the SAME high school growing up.
Him: THE popular guy, long hair, suave, had ALL the popular girls, was "mr. cool", etc.
Me: mousy brown straight hair, book-worm, quiet, shy, no one ever noticed me.
FAST FORWARD:
Him: fat, balding, grey hair
me: hot young looking 45 year old !!
HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway, here is how it all went about:
10 year high school reunion:
I ATTENDED, he did not.
20 year high school reunion:
He attended, I did not.
25 year high school reunion:
THIS is where we "met" and have been dating ever since (July 2000)
OKAY, so we met up again at the 25-year, and he was VERY, VERY nice to me, and told me he wanted to go out when we got back home, etc., WHICH I did not fully believe him that night, as he and his buddies were drinking (i thought quite heavily?) and so I didn't want to believe anything if he was talking out of his drunken state (I was drinking diet coke ONLY that night).
Okay, so he DID follow up, THAT Monday night and we went out to dinner and have been dating ever since.
HOWEVER, and the whole purpose of this pre-amble: THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN HEARING ABOUT, FOR ALL THESE 5 PLUS YEARS:
my boyfriend talking here: "The ONLY reason I went to the 25 year reunion, is because there were some HOT women there, and I wanted to hook up with THEM."
OKAY, so yeah, that made me feel sort of like, um, a "consellation prize" or something. in other words, NOT whom he REALLY wanted.
AND, he NEVER followed up his rude comments with "but see, I found someone SO MUCH BETTER, and for that I am SO HAPPY!!"
NOPE. None of that.
Only his rude and hurtful comments TO ME about how he WISHES those other women had been there, but oh darn, since they weren't there, he was "settling" for me!!!!!
And so of course you can IMAGINE how I was feeling at the onset of THIS upcoming 30 year reunion.....Because he has NEVER, EVER allowed ME to feel happy, or SECURE about OUR relationship, still to this day making comments on the OTHER women....the ones that "got away" !!!
Okay, so I am really CLOSE to one of the main girls planning the reunion. She approached me earlier this year to see if I wanted to HELP. AND, to ask if she could have boyfriends' info, and she would keep HIM informed too, etc.
SO, I asked him if this was okay, and he told me "no, I really don't want to get involved, and then they would be sending me info., and I really don't want the bother right now."
Okay, so fine, I told my friend that she could just send the info. to me, and I would share it with him.
BUT WHAT DID HE DO????????
He went BEHIND MY BACK, and CONTACTED HER, and VOLUNTEERED HIS BAND TO PLAY AT THE REUNION !!!!!
AND, I didn't even find this out, until during the summer, when we all received our packets of preliminary information, HIS BAND'S NAME WAS LISTED!!
SO, he not only went behind my back, but now he didn't even have to pay the fee to attend!!!! THIS really made my blood boil!!! And too, that also meant that I would be ALONE!!!
So, I quickly made my OWN room reservation at the hotel (KNOWING that he would just NOT invite me to come to the room to get ready BEFOREhand, and that he would FURTHER try and hide the fact that he DID get a room, because I was thinking that his PLAN would be to ditch me and FINALLY get those that "got away" !!!)
Anyway, I called my younger sister, and she made plans to come down and join me, so that was a GREAT relief to me. PLUS, I FURTHER did not inform HIM of what I planned, and I know this is sad, but I feel like I am turning into HIM, the sneaky, conniving, secretive JERK!!!
OKAY, so those plans into action, no real events happened, until the night of the reunion:
First of all, I was SUCH a nervous wreck!! I was anticipating SO much drama and stress, and I was only PARTIALLY right, because the ONE woman he kept talking about, WAS THERE!! We shall call her A.M.
Okay, so the fact that she was THERE, no biggie. HOWEVER, she OBVIOUSLY thought she was "all that" and that the whole reunion was ALL ABOUT HER!!! SERIOUSLY!!! I don't know WHERE she gets off, because she was pretty much an AMAZON WOMAN in h.s., and has OBVIOUSLY had so much work done!!!
She was also allegedly a cheerleader for an NFL team in the early 80's and that seems to be her claim to fame. THEN, she doesn't bring her husband of 14 years....hmmm???
ALL THAT wasn't bad enough, but when my boyfriend got up to start the music, SHE rushed over there, and tried to start chatting with him....WHILE THEY WERE PLAYING!! And to me, I found this VERY comical, as I know him!! That is a definite "no-no" in his book.....because when they are playing, he thinks he is "all that" and that NO ONE should come and try and distract him/them!! So that was funny to me.
But then, she buys him a beer!!! I am SERIOUS. At first, I could NOT believe it!! and I knew that he enjoyed that "gesture" very much (EVEN THOUGH she made another HUGE mistake and bought him a Bud, and everyone who KNOWS him, KNOWS that he will NOT drink a Bud, not EVER, as it gives him a head ache!! so that was another strike against her stupid ass).
ANYWAY, so even though I was feeling FURIOUS, I decided to "go the other way".....INSTEAD of trying to COMPETE with her and go rushing over there to buy him a REAL drink, NO!!! THAT would have put me in DIRECT competition WITH HER, and I did NOT want to go there. ALSO, that would have made me look PATHETIC, and besides, HE should be buying ME a drink, not the other way around!!!
Okay, so what I decided to DO, was TREAT HER LIKE THAT WAS HER "JOB", buying drinks for the band. LIke she was the SERVANT. So, fast-forward....me and my sister were going to the ladies' room, and she was in there with her "posse"....and I just walked right up to her, and poked her in the chest with my index finger, and said "hey, A.M., (my boyfriend's name here) NEEDS ANOTHER BEER!" In other words, ESTABLISHING HER AS A SERVANT, who was now remiss at SERVICING the band!!!! I have to admit, it was TOTALLY HILARIOUS!! Becasue she then gives me this look like "how dare she think I am not GREAT" and then she says "well, he can get it himself!!" and so too, she MAY HAVE thought that HE SENT ME IN THERE TO ASK HER FOR ANOTHER BEER!!!!!
Okay, so after THAT incident, she FURTHER displayed signs of air-headedness thusly: I was talking to a guy, just me and him, M.F. SHE comes waltzing up, takes him by the shoulders and points him AWAY from me and TOWARD her, and says "YOU are like a fine wine, you get better with age!!"
SERIOUSLY!!! THAT is what she said! THen, she PROCEEDS to monopolize HIM, and I was just standing there like "what the fuck??" and so she FINALLY lowers her eyesight on me, as if to say "oh, you're still here? why?" and says to me "oh, and you are????" and TRIES to look down at my name badge to see WHO I am (as mentioned, I look TOTALLY different from high school days)......and so I immediately covered up my name tag and said that I did NOT go to that h.s., and that I was "here with my sister", and......SHE TOTALLY BELIEVED ME!!!
Fast-forard to later on in the evening, she was a helper in doing the raffle drawings, and I just happened to win a t-shirt.....so when she called my name, and saw me come up to get my prize, she says to me...."OH!!! IT IS YOU!!!" and I was like "duh....YOU THINK???" I guess AMAZON WOMEN come in "dumb blonde" as well (i am blonde, so I can say these things!!)
THAT is how really DUMB she is. But the rest of the evening was rather un-eventful, except we were doing the dancing thing at the end, and she was looking at me like "who is this person?" as I obviously knew all the band memebers, etc., PLUS I TOO, was giving HER a "run for her money" on the dance floor, as she was REALLY looking at me, trying to figure it all out.
And too, SINCE me and b/f did not walk IN to the reunion TOGETHER, and SINCE we didn't eat together, and SINCE he was later playing with the band, NO ONE THERE EVEN KNEW WE WERE TOGETHER!!!!!
After the band stopped playing, they had to put all their stuff away, so me and my sister went to one of the others' rooms to "party" and b/f found us later, but I think at that time, I was thinking that I didn't really CARE all that much about what HE was up to, and he COULD HAVE gone to her room, or whatever, but I just have that philosophy that whatever he wants to do, he will do it, and my presence wouldn't change all that much.
The BEST PART: The next day, was the traditional "picnic", which I told b/f I could NOT care less about. HOWEVER, HE WANTED TO GO, so of course, I had to go too, because there was NO WAY I was going to turn him "loose" with HER around. and, sure enough, AGAIN, she shows up and thinks EVERYTHING is ALL ABOUT HER!! BUT, this time she brings her husband, WHICH WAS AWESOME. ALSO, an extra added BONUS: MY OLD BOYFRIEND, H.T.L.B.C. was there!, TOTALLY complimenting ME, in front of b/f.....it was COOL !!!!! Also, another guy from AHS was there, ALSO giving me TOTAL kudos and compliments, and I was loving EVERY minute!!
SO, bottom line right now is this: IF he has any contact with her, or whatever, there is nothing I can do about all of that. He will do what he will do, and I won't be able to change a thing.
He DID take a trip on the Friday AFTER Thanksgiving WITHOUT ME, to one of our classmates who lives over an hour away, and yes, that hurt me that he didn't want me to go, but I was trying to think WHY he didn't want me there:
a. He is doing the loan for their house, and claims it was only business (which is complete and totall b.s., I KNOW!!)
B. WHAT could he be trying to hide? I even came right out and asked HIM if they were trying to set him up with someone, as if I know my b/f, he would NEVER admit he even HAS a girlfriend, much less that it is ME. I just said "what happened?" (when he called the next day)..."was she UGLY, OR WHAT??" Don't want to be ms. dumb shit here....
c. he ONLY did that because he was PISSED that I did not include him in MY Thanksgiving plans (oh sure that is right.!)?
But see THIS RIGHT HERE is the type of thing that he does...goes to their place (close to San Diego) WITHOUT ME, and told me he was there from noon on, and didn't arrive home until "late" (so late that he didn't even bother calling me all that day or night).
That not only HURT me, my feelings, but I don't understand it. WHY would anyone WANT TO go to a nice little town ALL DAY, and NOT bring their partner?
AGAIN, at the risk of sounding like THE dumbest girlfriend in the world....I am not a guy, but I know that if I were to be visiting an old friend, and it was a long day, A DAY OFF, which is VERY RARE for me, to NOT INCLUDE ME.....
Just want to know WHY???????????
And I have asked him. Straight out, asked "WHY???" and he tells me it is "no big deal" and that he is doing his loan, and that he just wanted to go alone???....but still, HIS B.S. DOESN'T COME CLOSE TO BEING A GOOD ANSWER.
I don't think there IS a "good" answer as to WHY or HOW he can do things like this, am I really and TRULY NOT THAT IMPORTANT TO HIM, NOT AT ALL???
WHY did he take me on the Las Vegas weekend? Maybe it is a situation where he doesn't mind if STRANGERS see us together, but he doesn't want the people he KNOWS to know we are together?
that too doesn't make sense, as I recall, when we first started dating, a KEY phrase he told me: "This is really great. (seeing me) It's been a long time since I've had someone to show off."
NOW, knowing him the way I do now, this TOTALLY makes sense! he is ALWAYS trying hard, REALLY HARD, to make EVERYONE he knows jealous, feel bad, feel like HE has it all and they have NOTHING. He ENJOYS making his friends and family feel BAD.
Need to go puke now..........
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